Day 5 as a Mother

I have really dreaded being a mother. To have a little being that I’m responsible for, that needs ME all day long. It made all of my selfishness shine. But here I am. Day 5 of it, and it’s not even like I made a choice. I just became what I am. My sweet baby makes this so easy. I feel comfortable, I feel empowered to be what I am. She’s let’s me be this new person I’ve been all along.

Sitting down now, rocking my daughter her laying peaceful on my chest, I am overwhelmed by how much I adore this. The lead up to this birth was so hard. I was a very un gracious pregnant person. I hope to be a more gracious mother.

I know I’m in the honeymoon phase with parenting, but oh man I’m basking in it. My body is sore, I’m sleepy, but I am SO full of joy.

God’s goodness is fully seen here. He knew me as a mother, he knit together this child, he enabled me to get to this place. He truly knows what we need so much better than we know.

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Dozens of Us?

Years ago, I dreamed of this blog with my best friend and we work shopped different names. Dozens of Us stuck.

It comes from the show Arrested Development and the hilarious Tobias Funke. He is a never-nude (which isn’t a real thing). But in his declaration of his condition of being one, he chants ,”There are dozens of us! DOZENS!”

I feel like that is a pretty accurate description of who I hope to read this blog. People who feel a bit alone, but also know that we can’t be the only ones who feel alone. Just like Tobias, there are still at least a dozen of us who feel this way.